I don't need anyone
by artistic-junkie
Summary: Santana, was almost ready to run and hide. Back into the closet once Brit turned her her down. My way on how I'd like to see Santana come out the closet, and falling in love. Not following story line.
1. Chapter 1

What the fuck, how the hell did Brittany, Brittany of all people, Brittany who thinks breakfast is confusing, turned me down. But to make matters…why the hell am I sitting in this bathroom stall crying like an idiot. Come on Santana, you're the most gorgeous girl in the school….and the most flirtatious. What the fuck, come on, no one is turning you down…but its Brittany, it's not just anyone, it's my best friend, the girl who made me the way I am today. I heard the bell ring, and grabbed a few more tissues, shit I'm late. I cleaned myself and finally stepped out of the stall I was in. I looked in the mirror, maybe I should just remove it, there's no hope for it now. I thought as I took a wet paper towel and began to take off my makeup. About five minutes later, I was finally done.

Thankfully we had a sub in my English class so I didn't have to worry about giving a detailed explanation about my lateness (such a prick is Mr. Lew). I didn't feel like looking at anyone really so I took a seat in the back of the class next to some new kid. She was pretty, she was working on some form of sketch, I didn't pay much attention, I just put my head down on my desk and called it a day. I don't know when or how much time I had my head placed down, but I eventually felt a poke to my shoulder.

"Um, excuse me do you happen to have any lead? My pencil ran out." She said holding her pencil in her hand.

"Uh, hold on." I reached into my book bag, and looked around for an extra pencil.

"No lead, sorry, does this work?"

"Sure thanks." Nothing more happened up until the next bell rang.

"Thanks again." She said with a smile

"No problem."

"Maybe I'll see you again sometime." And with that she was gone, and I was headed on my way to Glee club.

All these damn happy ass people here. Of course there's Rachel babbling off for some shit that no one will think is important. Blaine and Kurt are over there being Cuddled…hold on what the hell is he even doing here? And of course there's Britney. Holding on to Artie. When really she should be cuddled next to me. I should be kissing her, that should be me! I tried to hold back my tears, but I was slightly unsuccessful so two fell before I went to sit in the back of the room.

Thank God for that man I call a teacher for walking in the room.

"Welp guys, looks like we have a few new additions to new directions." So corny.

"So welcome Blaine, and Elma." I looked up, and saw the both of them stand getting ready to audition. So I'm guessing prep school transferred to be with his lover boy. Pussy whipped. I've seen Elma before…wait a minute. I just saw her, she still has my pencil. Hm oh well.

"So who's going first guys?" Blaine raised his hand and got up.

"This one's for you Kurt." He said with a smile and a sly wink.

_**You think I'm pretty**_

_**Without any makeup on**_

_**You think I'm funny**_

_**When I tell the punchline wrong**_

_**I know you get me**_

_**So I let my walls come down, down**_

_**Before you met me**_

_**I was alright but things**_

_**Were kinda heavy**_

_**You brought me to life**_

_**Now every February**_

_**You'll be my Valentine, Valentine**_

_**Let's go all the way tonight**_

_**No regrets, just love**_

_**We can dance, until we die**_

_**You and I, will be young forever**_

_**You make me feel**_

_**Like I'm livin' a**_

_**Teenage dream**_

_**The way you turn me on**_

_**I can't sleep**_

_**Let's run away and**_

_**Don't ever look back,**_

_**Don't ever look back**_

_**My heart stops**_

_**When you look at me**_

_**Just one touch**_

_**Now baby I believe**_

_**This is real**_

_**So take a chance and**_

_**Don't ever look back,**_

_**Don't ever look back**_

_**We drove to Cali**_

_**And got drunk on the beach**_

_**Got a motel and**_

_**Built a fort out of sheets**_

_**I finally found you**_

_**My missing puzzle piece**_

_**I'm complete**_

_**Let's go all the way tonight**_

_**No regrets, just love**_

_**We can dance, until we die**_

_**You and I, will be young forever**_

_**You make me feel**_

_**Like I'm livin' a**_

_**Teenage dream**_

_**The way you turn me on**_

_**I can't sleep**_

_**Let's run away and**_

_**Don't ever look back,**_

_**Don't ever look back**_

_**My heart stops**_

_**When you look at me**_

_**Just one touch**_

_**Now baby I believe**_

_**This is real**_

_**So take a chance and**_

_**Don't ever look back,**_

_**Don't ever look back**_

_**I'mma get your heart racing**_

_**In my skin tights jeans**_

_**Be your teenage dream tonight**_

_**Let you put your hands on me**_

_**In my skin tight jeans**_

_**Be your teenage dream tonight**_

_**Yoooouuu**_

_**You make me feel**_

_**Like I'm livin' a**_

_**Teenage dream**_

_**The way you turn me on**_

_**I can't sleep**_

_**Let's run away and**_

_**Don't ever look back,**_

_**Don't ever look back**_

_**No**_

_**My heart stops**_

_**When you look at me**_

_**Just one touch**_

_**Now baby I believe**_

_**This is real**_

_**So take a chance and**_

_**Don't ever look back,**_

_**Don't ever look back**_

_**I'mma get your heart racing**_

_**In my skin tights jeans**_

_**Be your teenage dream tonight**_

_**Let you put your hands on me**_

_**In my skin tight jeans**_

_**Be your teenage dream tonight**_

Some where mid song I saw Kurt smiling, Rachel looking as though she was going to talk to Blaine about being her duet partner, and me, well I'm pissed, I could be doing THAT shit right there to Brit, but she chose some stupid ass boy over me. Come on Sanny, you already took your make up off. No more crying today. At the end of the song, with the last few strums, everyone clapped.

"Well I think that's a unanimous yes. Welcome to new directions Blaine." Shue said with a slap to his back.

"Glad to be here." He said with a smile and went to sit next to Kurt, slipping in a quick kiss before sitting down. Ugh.

"Alright Elma. What do you have for us?"

She stood up, she was wearing dark skinny jeans, combat styled boots, and what looked like an Aerosmith logo shirt. Her curly hair was pulled back into a pony tail and she wore glasses.

"Um I'll be doing Judas by Lady Gaga, much more toned down though."

"Alright the floor is yours."

She pulled her guitar out its case and started singing

_**Ohohohoh**_

_**I'm in love with Judas**_

_**Ohohohoh**_

_**I'm in love with Judas**_

_**Judas! Judaas Judas! Judaas**_

_**Judas! Judaas Judas! **_

_**When he comes to me I am ready**_

_**I'll wash his feet with my hair if he needs**_

_**Forgive him when his tongue lies through his brain**_

_**Even after three times he betrays me**_

_**I'll bring him down, bring him down, down**_

_**A king with no crown, king with no crown**_

_**I'm just a Holy Fool, oh baby he's so cruel**_

_**But I'm still in love with Judas, baby**_

_**I'm just a Holy Fool, oh baby he's so cruel**_

_**But I'm still in love with Judas, baby**_

_**Ohohohoh**_

_**I'm in love with Judas**_

_**Ohohohoh**_

_**I'm in love with Judas**_

_**Judas! Judaas Judas! Judaas**_

_**Judas! Judaas Judas! **_

_**I couldn't love a man so purely**_

_**Even prophets forgave his crooked way**_

_**I've learned love is like a brick you can**_

_**Build a house or sink a dead body**_

_**I'll bring him down, bring him down, down**_

_**A king with no crown, king with no crown**_

_**I'm just a Holy Fool, oh baby he's so cruel**_

_**But I'm still in love with Judas, baby**_

_**I'm just a Holy Fool, oh baby he's so cruel**_

_**But I'm still in love with Judas, baby**_

_**Ohohohoh**_

_**I'm in love with Judas**_

_**Ohohohoh**_

_**I'm in love with Judas**_

_**Ew**_

_**In the most Biblical sense,**_

_**I am beyond repentance**_

_**Fame hooker, prostitute wench, vomits her mind**_

_**But in the cultural sense**_

_**I just speak in future tense**_

_**Judas, kiss me if offenced,**_

_**Or wear an ear condom next time**_

_**I wanna love you,**_

_**But something's pulling me away from you**_

_**Jesus is my virtue,**_

_**Judas is the demon I cling to**_

_**I cling to**_

_**I'm just a Holy Fool, oh baby he's so cruel**_

_**But I'm still in love with Judas, baby**_

_**I'm just a Holy Fool, oh baby he's so cruel**_

_**But I'm still in love with Judas, baby**_

_**Ohohohoh**_

_**I'm in love with Judas**_

_**Ohohohoh**_

_**I'm in love with Judas**_

_**Judas! Judaas Judas! Judaas**_

_**Judas! Judaas Judas! **_

So I swear when she was singing the part about Judas and Jesus at me. But that may just my mind just over hearing shit. I shook my head and continued to clap, this girls got some nice lungs on her. Sides, this girl doesn't know the truth, what she doesn't know, won't hurt her.

"Wow, that was a great audition." Mr. Shue said with a chuckle. "So any who moving along, this week's assignment. There's no theme, but you must work in groups, no less than four." Damnit shue. "And you don't get to pick your partner!" He pulled out a number for each of us to take a number. Number four….great. I took a look around and noted everyone pulling toward their groups. Okay so I'm not with porcelain, nor McCripple pants, fuck why is that new girl coming over here….and Berry, and Blaine, what am I just over fucked today.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2 - Part 1

'What the fuck? Really bitch, really? 'I was walking down the hallway the next day when I heard it. I turned around to see the new kid in glee, just get slushied and she looked pissed.

'That's what you get hanging with those faggy glee geeks.' That was the last thing Karofsky said before he was punched dead in the mouth. The girl may not look it but that was a pretty hard punch if he held his face.

'At least I'm not stuck hiding in the closet like some fag.'

'Be glad I don't hit girls'

'Well let's be glad I'm not giving a fuck.' She said dropping her bag, and that was it, Dave charged at her and I almost ran over to stop it. But I stayed still; it ended up being a full fledged fight right there in the middle of the hallway.

'woah woah woah guys break it up.' Mr. Shue came in and pulled Elma off of Dave. Somehow she was winning this fight.

'Now Elma do you want to explain this to me?'

'he started it, he threw a slushy to my face. Why should I just stand and take it?' Mr. Shue rubbed his temple and mumbled something under his breath. The crowd began to die down a bit and Shue escorted Dave to the nurse's office.

I walked into the bathroom, and saw Elma standing over the counter with a few paper towels.

'Great this is never gonna come out.' She mumbled, and turned when the door closed. She smiled so brightly for someone just getting out of a fight.

'Hey, Santana right?' I nodded.

'Hey nice way to kick karofsky's ass out there.'

'haha thanks. Welp, if I get this every day, he'll just get used to it.' She had the oddest smirk on her face. There were still traces of slushy everywhere on her clothes. Woah woah, what the hell? She started taking her shirt off ah, okay; she has a spare…smart move.

'Uh…I'll catch you in class.' I said exiting the bathroom.

'Later' I was gone as her voice slowly faded.

Thankfully its only first period. Or me being 5 minutes late would be hard to explain. Elma came in not too long after. We listened to a few announcements, and then we heard it

'Elma Rodgers, please report to Principal Figgins office, Elma Rodgers please report to Principal Figgins office.' She looked down and smiled slightly before asking the teacher for a pass to the office.' She didn't come back until the end of class.

'What happened to you?' I asked as she walked back in.

'Welll, Figgins gave me a warning since I'm a new kid, and I kinda have a very good way with words about getting that kid out of here forever. So I'll see you in glee beautiful.' She said with a sly wink. I think I felt my cheeks blush. I stammered a bit.

'Well, uh see you in glee.' And was halfway out the door.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 2 - Part 2

That girl has slightly been infecting my thoughts all day. Well aside from Brittany, whom I still have yet to speak to since the blow up in the hallway. Ah, glee club the end of my day. I walked through the door, so far Blaine and Kurt were there practically eye fucking the shit out of each other. Rachel was there and so was Brit and Artie, I sighed a bit. I heard a guitar being picked at from the chair I usually sit at...Elma.

'Hey' she placed her guitar down and looked at me.

'Hi' I said looking at her and taking a seat in front of her.

'So I was thinking of a song for our group, and I think I settled on something all of us will enjoy.'

'Oh really, and that would be?'

'Amy Winehouse, Love is a Losing Game' I think my breath hitched...I don't even think I could go through with that song...not with Brit watching.

'There's no way Rachel could get the lead, well at least at one time, it would more than likely rotate me, you, and Blaine and Tachel.' I called Blaine over, he almost looked pained to leave Kurt, I hate how happy they can be sometimes. I think I'm just jealous. It took all but 15 minutes to have our idea ready to go. This chick's got a good taste in music.

We were gonna keep it simple, Blaine would play piano, she's play the guitar very smoothly.

We presented that day.

Blaine and Rachel took the first section...

_For you I was a flame_  
><em>Love is a losing game<em>  
><em>Five story fire as you came<em>  
><em>Love is a losing game<em>

_One I wish I never played_  
><em>Oh what a mess we made<em>  
><em>And now the final frame<em>  
><em>Love is a losing game<em>

Me and Elma came in around now and Blaine and Rachel harmonized back noises... I can't do this

_Played out by the band_  
><em>Love is a losing hand<em>  
><em>More than I could stand<em>  
><em>Love is a losing hand<em>

_Self professed... profound_  
><em>Till the chips were down<em>  
><em>...know you're a gambling man<em>  
><em>Love is a losing hand<em>

I was in tears, Brit was holding Artie's hand, and squeezing it, Same holding Mercedes... I can't do this

_Though I battle blind_  
><em>Love is a fate resigned<em>  
><em>Memories mar my mind<em>  
><em>Love is a fate resigned<em>

_Over futile odds_  
><em>And laughed at by the gods<em>  
><em>And now the final frame<em>  
><em>Love is a losing game <em> 

I cried on the end, Mr. Shue congratulated us, but by then I was gone.

'Santana?' I heard my name called and didn't even care to look back. I was gone, I was fiddling for my keys out my purse when I dropped my bag, thank God the school was empty. I sat on the floor and cried. I hate this. I don't like these emotions, someone just make them go away. I saw a shadow coming behind me. Fuck. I wiped my eyes and turned around. It was Elma.

'Hey, you ran out of there pretty quickly, you alright?' she sent a text on her phone and then looked back at me.

'Y-yea, I'm fine.' I lied, my make up was running, and I looked like shit. But she didn't need to know that.

'You can be honest with me you know, I won't judge.' She sat down in the hall next to me. I cried even harder.

'You can't possibly know what I feel like right now, this is you're fault, that stupid song, fuck.' She didn't even budge, she looked interested actually, and she was still listening.

'so you wanna tell me, what's going on here?' she said. I told her everything, from the first time I told Brit I loved her, to the first time we kissed. She looked at me still interestingly.

'So you love the girl, she rejects you, because you're just realizing you're a lesbian, and she's bisexual, so she's currently with someone else.'

'Pretty much.'

'there's nothing odd about that at all.' She leaned back a bit more, resting on her puff of hair. 'If you really love her, you'll wait, wait as long as the sun waits to set everyday. But in case she's truly happy, make yourself happy for now, find something to make you smile. I know I'm in no position to speak, it just happened yesterday. Give yourself time to recover, and then get back in the game.' she smiled at me. I think I blushed at her. She stood up, and offered her hand to me. I was about to walk off when she called me back I turned around and she walked one step to me.

'You're far to pretty to frown.' She kissed my cheek and walked off. What the hell does this mean? I held my hand to my cheek all the way to my car...I need someone to talk to... I'll all Porcelain sometime later tonight.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: I own nothing. Except Elma. And thank you all for checking this out :) Means a hella lot. Sorry my updates are inconsistent, just swamped with school work :P.

Anyway please enjoy!

AU! After Sexy, I'm not bringing in Samtana into this so that's gonna explain part of this chapter

First time writing smut

* * *

><p>Chapter 3 - It's a Date<p>

To me it never mattered how many guys I slept with.

They never mattered anyway. I just needed to fill a void. Something missing. Physical intimacy, maybe a make out session. Half the time I barely cared to remember who it was or why we met I could care less.

But when it came down to women.

I was so self guarded until I met Brit. Sure she may be a bit dingy, so what. She's beautiful, she's perfect. She can dance her ass off. She-she's everything I could have wanted. Even when I hold her, my arms fit perfectly around her waist.

But in real life.

Nothing is perfect.

Not even stupid things with the love of your life. My everything, turned no to my nothing.

That was the last thing I could think before Puck started talking

"So, tell me what you want baby?" he was sucking on my neck, really I was out of it, but I just wanted a good lay as a distraction.

"Just fuck me, babe" I said looking at him. He had this smug looking grin on his face. As he took of his shirt.

"I can do that," he mumbled before kissing me smack on the mouth. Might as well play into this. The moment it started I felt his tongue tracing my bottom lip. I really was kind of lazy so I didn't put up that much a fight for him to take control today.

He pulled of my shirt, after that went my bra, he took it in between his teeth and bit down hard then started sucking. Sucking hard. Britney always sucks my boobs so much more gently, more so of kitten licks then something close to nursing, a nibble here or there...

"Ouch, ouch, ouch" I half moaned to him. He took the hint and chose to lightly squeeze it in my hand as he sucked on the other one. He slowly made his way off and kissed a path down my stomach finally resting on my hip bone. He looked up at me eyes waiting for me to give a yes. I nodded, he ripped off my shorts, and gave me the best head I could remember in a while.

He was fucking around for a bit but then he finally stuck his finger inside, omg...

The only sound in the room was me making incoherent sentences, groans, moans, you name it.

I was in pure heaven.

It didn't take long before I came.

"P-p-Pu-Puck!"I stuttered and screamed out as he still licked me through my orgasm. He kissed his way back up and took out a finger for me to suck on.

So I kinda let it slip to him that I had a kink for the taste of my own come. Sucked on my breast again, and fingered me with the same finger. I was losing it, I kept bucking into his hand when he finally pushed me down.

"All you had to do was ask baby," he pulled his zipper down and pulled down his pants. He grabbed a condom out his wallet and was about to roll it on when I snatched it from him.

"No, let me," I whispered in his ear licking his earlobe and nibbling on it. I ripped it open, and rolled it on him. I turned around and got on all fours, like I said, I'm not here for anything but a distraction.

"Fuck me already," I said into the pillow, and I felt him line himself up at my entrance, and slowly filled me.

"Oh my god," I was moaning like a bitch in the heat. He pounded in and out me fast and hard with no mercy.

Profanities yelled,

Slapping skin

and extra bass music...

Just how I like it. He reached down and rubbed my clit and within minutes, I was coming again. He came too.

"That was amazing." he said laying his head back on my pillow.

"You always put on an amazing performance," I said with a wink kissing him.

We stayed in this post orgasmic bliss for a good 10 minutes, when Pucks phone went off.

"Hey babe," Lauren I presumed.

"No nothing at all what's up?"

"Sure give me a minute I'll be there in an hour. Love you too babe, bye." he put his phone on the table.

"Lauren wants to go catch a movie tonight." he said pulling his pants up. "I'll catch you at tomorrows game, my beautiful Latina babe." He said kissing me one last time. I got up to lock the door behind him, I slapped his ass and headed back upstairs. That session actually wore me out...nap time.

I woke up around 8:20ish, my phone was going off. I had a missed call and 2 new texts.

'Tana - what are you doing tomorrow? Wanna hang after the game?' - Brit, her ignorance is what made her shine sometimes.

'Hey Santana, I'm really sorry about earlier today, I-I didn't know what I was thinking. Oh and I got your number from Puck by the way.' - It was from a number I didn't recognize but I automatically assumed it was Elma. Grr...oh well, just ignore 'em both for now.

I got my cheerios uniform out, washed and set for tomorrow, and was munching on a hot dog when I heard my phone go off.

"Hello?" I asked not bothering to check the ID.

"Hey Santana, it's Elma, got a minute?" SHIT!

"Uh, yea hey what's up?"

"I don't know if you go my text, I had poor reception, but I wanted to say sorry for earlier. Kissing you was kinda out of line," I heard enough.

"Look it's fine." I said trying brush it off.

"Let me make it up to you, let me buy you coffee before tomorrow's game." This kid was persistent.

"Seriously?" I said snorting and rolling my eyes. Her tone didn't change however.

"Yea, and if you don't like it, I'll either keep trying or leave you alone." she said jokingly

"Come on, one coffee won't hurt you." hm...free coffee...

"Alright fine, I'll meet you up there at 10.

"See you then." and the line went dead.

I finished my hotdog, when it hit me, I just agreed to go on a date. A date. With a girl. In public. What the hell was I thinking?

* * *

><p>AN: thanks for waiting it out with me, I'm gonna try to update faster. I promise.


	5. Chapter 5

Thank you guys so much for staying with me :) correction I know I said after Sexy but change to being Slightly canon, I'm picking certain elements of the show and piecing it together the story. All of my readers, I love you all :) For this, FTM, or TBAA (which will be updated soon I swear!)

Again, I can't thank you enough for reading.

-Aristic_Junkie

* * *

><p>Chapter 4 - Her Morning Elegance<p>

I checked my watch, 10:05. I was late sure, but honestly, she's not too important so I'm ok running a bit late. I pulled out my phone and shot her a quick text telling her I was on my way out when I placed my sneakers on.

10 minutes later I was walking into he Lima Bean dressed in my Cheerios uniform.

Okay, the girl first off has money, I shoplifted those boots she has on last year. And honestly, the girls got body, she can dress. She was reading the latest edition of Vogue when I walked over to the table.

"Is this Seat taken?" I walked over to her table.

"Sure go right ahead. Morning Santana" she said placing her magazine down.

"I was waiting for you, so what do you want?" she was reaching in her bag for something.

"A medium drip and a blueberry muffin."

"Be right back." I had to admit, the girl rocked the hell out of her clothes. I turned and saw her leaning over the counter talking to the Batista, and then she winked at him. Hm guess she's straight then.

Ugh, maybe this wasn't such a good idea.

"Alright I'm back," she placed the coffee tray and two bags on the table, she unzipped her jacket and hung it on the back of her chair.

"Alright, one Chai Latte for me and pumpkin muffin for me, and a medium drip with a blueberry muffin for you." she said pushing the bag toward me.

"Thanks," I lifted the coffee to my mouth, and for once the coffee tasted beyond good. But then again, everything taste-correction is better free. I continued to keep up a bitch attitude, well, for as long as I could. It's kind of hard to be a bitch, when you kinda broke down in front of someone days ago. Not by your own choice however, but by pressure, yea that's it.

"So excited for the game?" her voice pulled me out of my thoughts, for a moment, I contemplated ignoring her.

"Hm," I took a sip of my coffee, "Sorry, I got kinda spaced out for a minute."

"Hey Santana, can I ask you something?" where's she getting at with this...

"Sure..."

"You know there are more bitches in the world than you think right?"

"Excuse me?" I said raising my voice.

"I said you're not original, you're rude, you were late, you're in your uniform giving off the jock aura, and honestly, sure you're pretty but you just- the more like this the more annoying I find you to be."

"Look you, I come from Lima Heights Adjacent, and you think you'll be fine crossing me like that, you got something wrong with you. Bad things happen and I ain't afraid to cut ya." She laughed...I really wasn't expecting that.

"As I said before, snarky, rude, and want to be intimidating. If you wanna be a jock go ahead, but honestly, being a bitch will only last til college. Yeesh how do you even keep a steady relationship for Pete's sake?" That was cold.

"So I'll try this again." she cleared her throat and sipped her latte. "Excited for the game today?" I was silent, just who the hell does she think she is like seriously, fucker wants to call me a bitch, then laugh at me?

"I'll take your silence as a yes." she sipped her latte and took a bite out of her muffin.

"I'm sorry why did you want me to get coffee with you again?" she hung her head fixed her hat and laughed.

"Wow, I think of all the people I've ever been with, you're by far the most jackass they get." Been with? excuse me?

"Excuse me, lil miss high bitch, I'm not with you"

"No, but I have had the pleasure of kissing you on the cheek." she smiled cheekily.

"Okay a kiss on the cheek is the new equivalent to hand holding." I took a bite of my muffin.

"Then here," before I had the chance to remark back she kissed me. "that enough for you?" Before I could even react she was walking to the door. I don't know what to do anymore. She kissed me, full on the mouth. In the middle of the Lima Bean. I'm wearing my Cheerios outfit so it's not hard to know where I go to school. Great. I may be out the closet now. With that sudden realization, I pulled my hood up, cleared the table, and ran to my car.

* * *

><p>We lost, which as usual I don't find surprising. Maybe if Frankenteen stopped looking in the stands and gawking at Rachel, we'd have a shot. I was walking to the showers, when Brit showed up.<p>

"Hey Tana, the Cheerios are all going out for dinner tonight...you wanna go?" Yes. Yes I want to go. I want to go just so I can be near you.

"Nah," I shook my head to add effect. "I'm a little sleepy"

"You aren't sick are you? Lord Tubbington says that when you get sick, you need more sleep than-"

"No, I um, I met up with someone for coffee this morning." She smiled at me. I remember when she would smile just for me.

"Sounds fun. See ya Monday?"

"Yea"

* * *

><p>"So let me get this right." Kurt put his bowl of ice cream and cookies down. I practically ran to Kurt's house, I didn't know who else to call, Mercedes is a blabber mouth, Rachel is annoying, boys are insensitive, and I never talk to Tina...so that's how I ended up here, in the Hummel house, with Quinn, Blaine and Kurt, with ice cream, cake, chips, and junk food to last for decades. "You ask Brit to leave Artie for you, she says no, then you accidentally told your life relationship story to Elma?" I nodded

"Who kissed you, wanted to make up with you, and ended up kissing you again?" Blaine looked at me with his signature confused look. The one that could only be described as an idiot.

"Either that girl really takes quick interest or she's really weird." said Quinn taking a bite from her ice cream.

"I guess, I mean honestly, I'll never be over Brit, she was..." I tried not to choke, I've spent 2 days crying over her, time to move on.

"Everything and more?" Quinn offered.

"Yea pretty much,"

"You know, I never got over Puck." Quinn set her ice cream bowl down and got serious for a moment. "Rather, I'll always know he was special to me. He has a special place in my heart, him and-and Beth. *clears throat* But I'll just have to live with the truth, and lives that we have. Puck's dating Lauren, I'm with Sam, and honestly it's just life. God forbid anything bad to Lauren, but if the both of us are ever single, would I do it all over again? Maybe, despite his whorish ways he's got heart."

"So pretty much what Brit said 'If I'm single, and you're single, we'll mingle.'"

"Yup" I took a bite of my ice cream. Of all things that are bullshitted, by situation is by the most.


	6. Chapter 6

Thank you guys so much for staying with me :)

I do not own Glee, and I do not own Blaqk Audio.

For the sake of this story, Santana wrote this song with Elma.

-Aristic_Junkie

* * *

><p>Chapter 5 - The Fear on Being Found<p>

"Alright first up, we have Santana and Elma!" Mr Shue announced to the entire glee club as we took the stage in the auditorium. It's been a month since the kiss, and to be honest. Elma's not that bad. She was seeming to be harsh, even I wouldn't kiss someone in the middle of the coffee shop. Well maybe I would but not anymore. We got stuck working on a group project, write a song. Trouty Mouth however, was unacceptable for our first attempt so we were forced to do this again. I took center stage, and she was on the piano behind me with a mic.

_(Santana)_

_I have been a world apart_  
><em>Stuck in between time.<em>  
><em>Head into the ground I'm found <em>  
><em>Falling through fault lines.<em>  
><em>I feel see through.<em>  
><em>Can you see through me?<em>

* * *

><p><em>*Flashback*<em>

_"So nothing scares you?" she asked looking at me. To be honest nothing did, maybe being a Lesbian did to some degree, but that was because I had a reputation to maintain. I couldn't have some girl when I've shagged every guy on the market. Plus I know McKinley, Jacob would've aired it on his next broadcast, I'd be the next Kurt. Or worse. I couldn't have that._

_We already wrote our song, I think my performance was good. But Elma claimed that my performance was lacking passion._

_"Nope"_

_"I think you're lying."_

* * *

><p><em>(Both)<em>

_Could I change one thing?  
>Could I change your mind?<br>Shall we burn it just like the last time?  
>I can't change a thing, can't explain why I never felt it<br>Not even the first time._

* * *

><p><em>*flashback*<em>

_"What makes you say that?" _

_"You make it too easy." I glared at her with a blank expression._

_"Okay, okay, then. Hm, let's fake passion!"_

_"What the hell? That doesn't even sound the same."_

_"Here me out, let's talk about Britney,"_

* * *

><p><em>(Santana)<em>

_Raise a glass and toast the flame  
>Just like the old days.<br>Swallow, but be careful, don't drown  
>The new ways you could say:<br>"Would you change this time?"  
>I'll begin to change my mind<br>When you can explain why  
>I feel see through.<br>Can you feel me?_

* * *

><p><em>"What about Brit?"<em>

_"Obviously you had feelings for her, channel those feelings, then make them as strong as you could be. Let's say about whatever you were afraid of as a kid?"_

_That girls in the locker room would realize, that I liked looking at them as they changed. "The dark I guess, or I had this monkey named Mr. Num Nums, and he got lost in my closet once, I was six, I didn't know he would come back."_

_"Then there channel your emotions to that"_

* * *

><p><em>(Both)<em>

_Could I change one thing?  
>Could I change your mind?<br>Shall we burn it just like the last time?  
>I can't change a thing, can't explain why I never felt it<br>Not even the first time._

* * *

><p><em>I think I realized something now, I'm a lesbian, nothing's going to change that. Meeting Britney in the locker room, that was fate. I can deny it all I want to but unless some guy's magical I have nothing to hide anymore.<em>

_I broke. I broke down into tears, crying so hard I thought I'd stop breathing. I couldn't stop, no one knew, all this time, I was this bitter bitch from my feelings, that I was so easy to hide because I was s girl. I cried for the way I treated Kurt, I cried for everything wrong I-I can't even begin to think how much this will kill me to hide, or even really kill me to tell._

_through my tears, I felt a warm pair of arms surround me and hold me close. I didn't run, I have nowhere else to go but some stranger that I barely knew. _

* * *

><p><em>(Elma)<em>

_Shall we?_  
><em>Nothings different<em>

* * *

><p><em>"Now, you've got some emotion. Let's try it again." she waited til my tears subsided. Hugged me, and gave a small peck to my cheek. <em>

* * *

><p><em>(Both)<em>

_Could I change one thing?_  
><em>Could I change your mind?<em>  
><em>Shall we burn it just like the last time?<em>  
><em>I can't change a thing, can't explain why I never felt it <em>  
><em>Not even the first time.<em>

"For one I may say that was an amazing performance. The piano ensemble was fantastic, your dress being phenomenal, you're-" Rachel began midway through the applause.

"Rachel, Rachel, thank you." Mr. Shue said. "That was actually the best I think I've seen.

"Aside from my and Kurt's performance."

"Phenomenal job you guys, I look forward to your next project." Everyone clapped. I'm not afraid of them, I'm still head bitch of the school, it was just a project no one ever has to know. But for some odd unapparent reason, there's this pang of guilt as if I need to tell everyone. I looked to Elma. Somehow I think even without telling her, she knows.

She had the nerve to smile at me, everyone else had gone.

"Fuck you." I said running backstage, I was barely there before breaking down into tears.

She confuses me, she knows everything, but nothing. I told her about my feelings for Brit, I convinced myself it was just her though. Somehow she knows this too, I just-I can't.

_"Hiding gets you everywhere and nowhere in life remember that." _Her words echoed through my ears. For the second time her arms wrapped around me.

"There's nothing to be afraid of, I'm sorry." she whispered in my ear.


End file.
